Tell me if you recognise this scenario:
You have a ton of ideas, some, you just know will take off, sending you into your dream life of success and happiness. There’s just one problem, you have no idea where to start, and you know that taking action requires bravery and a lot of hard work.
In 2017 I had a stonking realisation – I was blocking my path to achieving my dreams. At the time I thought it was because I was an introvert, or perhaps it just wasn’t meant to be. It was then that I discovered it. The thing that was stopping me from achieving my dreams, was me.
I’d been self-sabotaging myself for years, listening to my inner critic and stifling any progress I was making towards the life I truly wanted.
Let’s not let that happen to you. Below are five reasons why you’re blocking the path to achieving your dreams, and what you can do about it.
1. You believe you have limits
“I can’t speak in front of a group of people because I’m an introvert.”
“I can’t become a woman that people look up to because there’s nothing special about me.”
These, are limiting beliefs, and yes, they were mine.
I bet you have some similar ones and I bet that you think these ones are ridiculous. How could somebody possibly think they aren’t special, or that they can’t do something just because they’ve labelled themselves as an introvert?
Well, dear reader, it’s time for you to write yours down and see on paper how you talk to yourself daily. What ‘I can’ts’ or ‘I won’ts’ do you say often (even if it’s in your head)?
Your next step is to flip these. Instead of ‘I can’t’, write ‘I will’. By simply changing those few words, everything else falls into place. Trust me!
2. You compare yourself to others
We’re all guilty of this, and I mean everyone. We can scroll for hours looking at our friends, family and influencers – we perpetuate a culture of unworthiness.
But here’s the thing, comparing yourself to others is a complete and utter waste of time.
Nobody and I mean nobody, has your skills, experiences and knowledge. Nobody can compete with that. What’s more, that social media influencer you love to look at, they share a fraction of their real life online. Your worth shouldn’t be compared to what’s essentially a personal magazine. Remember that when you look at Khloé’s latest bikini shot.
3. You’re a perfectionist
“Done is better than perfect.” – Sheryl Sandberg
A perfectionist is a person who refuses to accept any standard short of perfection. Usually, this term is used as a compliment and believe me it does have its uses. But in this case, your constant desire for perfection is literally preventing you from achieving your dreams.
This is a hard lesson to learn (trust me!), but in order to achieve your goals, you need to get your amazing work out there. ASAP. Stop focusing in on the details that nobody will notice, you can always tweak your work later, once people have had the pleasure of seeing it.
4. You’re impatient
Let me guess, you want to achieve everything and you want to achieve it NOW.
You can see your dream life as if it’s real and right in front of you. The only problem is, you know it’s going to take months or even years for you to get there. So, your overwhelming desire to have it now actually ends up stopping you from moving even an inch. Your dream life you’ve been imagining for years has remained just that, a dream.
It’s time to take action. You’re constantly looking at the big picture, instead, you need to make it smaller. Break down your big dream into smaller goals, allow yourself the brain space to take it a little at a time. Progress, even if it’s a little each day will get you there. Over-thinking won’t.
5. You focus on the future or past, and not the now
If all we ever did was make decisions based on what happened to us in the past, there would be no progress.
Similarly, if all we ever did was look towards the future, we would fail to enjoy the journey.
You’re not the limits of your past and you’re not bound by what you see in the future. By living in the now and making decisions based on what you want to achieve and what feels good today, your life will have a lot more clarity.
Achieving your dreams takes a lot of hard work and courage. But if you can stop holding yourself back and instead become your own personal cheerleader and best friend, then your biggest hurdle fizzles away into nothingness.
You’ll be able to grow, re-shape your life and become the person you’ve dreamed of – all while enjoying the journey. What could be better than that?
diane e penn22nd May 2020 at 12:52 AM
I love this website. I finally feel that there are others I can relate to. I also like the fact that the articles are short and really get to the heart of the matter. So many other articles I’ve read drone on and on. It makes me feel like I can never complete all the” steps” and that just feeds into my perfectionism resulting in feeling overwhelmed and thus not doing anything. I think the difference is that you are an introvert too not just someone providing information without personal experience. As they say “It takes one to know one”.
Thank you so much
Gina Lucia22nd May 2020 at 1:04 PM
Ah thank you so much Diane, what nice things to say!
Nuryn26th July 2020 at 8:03 AM
Diane is sooo right. I’m literally opeing tab after tab of all your blog posts Gina, just binge reading.
Anyway, points 3, 4 and 5 really hit home.. just because im such an idealistic and impatient perfectionist, i have started and closed down 5 different business ideas and websites even before they had a chance to take off.
This time round, I’m going to give it a bit more time.
Gina Lucia27th July 2020 at 9:23 AM
Ah that makes me so happy! Honestly, one of the biggest realisations for me is that things take time to build. It doesn’t happen overnight, being persistent is key.
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